I thought I'd take a brief moment to provide a bit of education for the leather impaired--the AOL cyberdoms whose entire education consisted of reading a letter in Penthouse. Don't worry, I'll write slow so you can read it.

--CBT is NOT a cable channel. --A c**k ring is NOT where you go to watch c**k fighting. --Dom is not necessarily short for Dominic.

--Into English does NOT mean you serve tea and crumpets. --There's more to being a DM than running a DampD game. --Cropping is not necessarily trimming a photo. --Topping does not necessarily refer to what you order on your pizza. --Subs are not always the substitute teachers. --You don't throw away the ping pong paddles when you get rid of the table. --There's a lot more to waxing than putting a good finish on your car.

--Knife play is not advanced juggling. --Stocks have been used since the 17th century. --When I say suspension, I am not referring to the undercarriage of your car.

--The Leather Nation is not a gang of beer-guzzling, unshaven, long-haired bikers.

--KY Jelly is not jam from Kentucky. --Ball gag is not what happens when she deep-throats you. --247 does not refer to the hours of the corner 7-11. --Spreader bars are not where fat people go for drinks. --Drag queen doesn't refer to women who race cars. --When people in the scene refer to scat, it has absolutely nothing to with Ella's vocals.

--Subs are not grinders, although they can be bitten and eaten. --Tops are not necessarily the toys you outgrew as a kid. --Masters does NOT always refer to works by dead artists. It isn't always a golf tournament, either. --Caning on-line has very little to do with fixing a wicker chair. --Vampire gloves are not a 2 gauntlet in your fantasy RPG.

--Subs have a tendency to go down, but we are not talking about Hunt for Red October here. --If someone says they're a switch, odds are it has nothing to do with the way they bat.

--Water sports does not necessarily refer to surfing, swimming or water polo.

--Origami is not the real name for japanese bondage.

--A safeword is not a politically correct term.