A farmer's wife loves rare birds, so one day he decides to get her a talking parakeet for their aniversary. He goes to the pet shop and asks the clerk for a talking parakeet. The clerk goes into the back room and returns shortly with a covered birdcage. "Sir, this is the only one we have, but it has a small problem, so I don't think you'll want it." The farmer barely heard him, as he noticed the cheap pricetag on the cage. "No problem, " he said quickly.

"I'll take him.

" Then he paid the clerk and took the parakeet home to his ecsatic wife.

The next morning, the farmer woke up early to go milk his cows. When he arrived in the barn, he found that his wife's parakeet was furiously f**king one of the cows! The farmer was in shock, as he had never heard of anything like this before. However, he decided that he needed to try to break the parakeet of this, before his wife found out.

So, he yelled to the parakeet, "Stop doing that this instant! You're going to keep doing that until you die!" The parakeet looked at him, then flew off. The next morning, the farmer got up early to go collect his eggs.

When he arrived at the henhouse, he noticed the parakeet was furiously f**king one of the hens! The farmer remembered how he had made the parakeet stop his perversion the day before, so he yelled, "Stop doing that this instant! You're going to keep doing that until you die!" And, like the day before, the parakeet looked at him, then flew off. The next morning, the farmer woke up early to milk his cows. When he arrived at the barn, however, he noticed that the parakeet was no where to be seen. "I guess he did f**k himself to death, " the farmer chuckled. After he milked the cows, he led them out to pasture. And sure enough, as he opened the gate, he noticed the parakeet lying on its back on the cold earth.

The farmer grinned and walked over to his wife's dead pet. "I told you, you stupid bird!" he laughed, as he looked down at the motionless animal. "I told youthat you were gonna keep doing that until you died! A hah hah hah hah!!" Suddenly, the parakeet opened its eyes, looked up at the farmer, and said with one feather to its lips and another pointing to the sky, "Ssssshh. Buzzards.

"