An old man sat on the edge of his nursing home bed making car noises acting as if he was driving. VAROOOOOMMMMM!!!! A young nurse walked up and asked, "Mr Johnson, what are you doing this morning?" He replied, " I'm driving to California to see my son." "Thats very nice.", the nurse said softly. She then walked into the next room to check on another patient.At that moment she saw Mr. Smith kneeling in the corner masturbating!! "Mr. Smith!What are you doing?" she gasped. "Ssssshhhhh!!!!" he cried.

"I'm f**king Mr. Johnsons' wife while he's driving to California!!"